“doctor, is cancer can be treated?”, I was asking Dr Oby when he explained to us about prostate cancer.

“yes. But it depends on many factors. Age,health condition and… what type of cancer?”, he asked me back.

                           

“errr… urm.”

“general cancer??”

“yea. Something like that.”

“like what I explained just now. Depends on the type of cancer. But most of the cancer is fatal”.

Dr Oby sambung lagi.

"..... my mom and dad both died because of cancer. my dad was having colon cancer and my mom was having breast cancer...."

jawapan yang cukup buat aku hiba. Im sorry doctor.

And guess what. Why im asking such a weird question. Sebab….. teringat kat Mato. 

Bukan. Bukan sebab caring or ape. Tapi sebab sayang.

Ehh.. tak caring,tapi sayang??

Ohh..please don’t misunderstood.

I mean,.. sayang untuk kehilangan someone special like him.

“talented Da’ie.”

Saya.. medical student jugak. Cuma tempat kami belajar je lain. Dia jauh di Edinburgh. Saya jauh merantau disini.

***

“apesal sedih sangat? He got nothing to do with you.kenal ke? Or sebab dia hensem?”

“kenal pon tak. Ade hati nak cakap hensem.”

“dah tu?? Apesal emo sangat? See. Cakap pon berair mata. Actually what happen hah? Dari semalam lagi aku tengok,since you finish belek-belek your phone, tetibe muka cam orang tengah tahan nak nangis What’s going on? Ape nama dia? Mato? Nama pon dah macam buah tomato.”

“he’s…… a great guy.”

“so??”

“great daie. Legend. Doctor. Skater. Munsyider.”

“okay”, dia membetulkan kusyen dibelakang supaya agak selesa.

“he  give a great contribution to ummah.. dalam alam maya,takde sape kenal siapa dia. But people keep guessing itu ini, well.. sape tak curious.”

“buat ape nak curious? Just let him be. Asalkan he spread something good to be shared. Enough. “

Jeling ke sebelah. “are you gonna hear my story about him?’, i asked her dengan nada geram. suka sangat potong time orang tengah nak citer dengan penuh feel ni.

“sorry,teruskan”, sambil matanya memandang syiling.

“I don’t know how I can come across his blog. Interesting. Sangat. Cara penulisan dia. Ade orang comment,cakap gaya dia ade iras Hlovate. Memang menyentuh jiwa,menyentap rasa. Even kalau aku down,or having some problems, selain doa, mintak Allah tunjukkan jalan.. well. As you know,setiap masalah ade jalan keluar. Kalau nak tido, aku akan bukak blog dia. Then,kalau ape yang dia tulis kene tepat ngan my condition time tu,, mulalah aku leleh. Sentap beb.”

“then,apesal kau sedih sekarang. Aku tumpang happy plus bangga. Hlovate doctor, and he is also dlm proses nak jadi doctor.. but both of them ade mase,nak tulis cerita and karang blog segala. Nak didik ummah yang memang dahaga ngan tarbiah.”

“tahu..”

“ape??”

“ishh kau nie. Jap la. Nak amik udara. Aku sebak sekarang nie. Kang tak pasal-pasal pengsan atas riba kau nie.”

“woii..  cepatlah bagitau kenapa? Kau Nampak tak buku Anatomy tuh tengah sengih-sengih depan aku. Da nak final wehh. Cepa…..”

“he’s having cancer.”

Perlahan-lahan dia tutup buku di tangan. Tubuhnya membelakangi ku.

Sahabat ku ini,Nampak kasar, Nampak cam jiwa takleh blahh.. tapi.

“aku tak sanggup nak dengar. Aku tetibe.. rindu arwah Ammar. Aku rindu insan-insan mulia macam dia. Kenapa?? Kenapa orang baik semua kene tinggalkan kita?”

“aku tahu kau tanya bukan sebab kau nak pertikai takdir, tapi.. kau sedar kan nie zaman ape?”

“akhir zaman. Fitnah berleluasa. Zina merata-rata. Depan mata. Aku sedar”’

“aku blah dulu.” setelah beberapa saat kami dua-dua terdiam. menyelami perasaan masing-masing.

“joy,..”

“ape?”

“nama dia.. Nik Haseef Irsyad Nik Shahrir. Kau mesti nak tolong doakan dia kan?”

“sape cakap? Aku bukan kenal dia.”

“apesal suara cam pelik je? Sebak eh?’

“takde ahh.. peti suara aku nie elok je.”

“joy, doakan dia eh? Even tak kenal dia siapa,tapi dia kan saudara seislam kita. Aku rasa kau lebih faham sebenarnya”

“inshaAllah. I cant imagine. Almost Sixth year dye study medicine. And yet, he try to cure people,but now..”

“jap. Weh. Cane kau tahu dia tahun akhir?” tanpa menunggu Joy menghabiskan kata-kata,aku terus potong. Yang nie memang curious tahap gaban.

“cause I know him.”

“how can…?? wehh!! kau jangan memain ngan aku. punyalah curious nak tahu dye sape."

"takyah. tak penting. dahla weh,aku balik bilik dulu. "

"jap. stage berape?"

"ape??"

"that guy.. stage ke berapa dah?"

"entah. aku tak sure. eh.. tak tahu. dia tak bagitahu. kau....."

ishh dia nie. suka sangat blahh cam tu je. Dan... sangat berahsia.

***

MATO. get well soon. 

AM.

monday

Egypt.